Whispers of a Throne Read online

  If I was to be queen here one day, everyone needed to see I supported Thor now. What happened on my first day in the courtyard could not be repeated. It was best if people saw it was me, and not a child-riding pillion with their king.

  A small boy clutched his mother's skirt as he stood beside his parents. This family was just one of many who would need to be in the safest part of the town.

  Merlin and Delott rode on either side of us. My heart beat raced as I stared at Delott and a cold shiver raced down my spine. Delott was too close for comfort.

  Thor moved ahead. As soon as the doors closed, there would be no more smiles. No more happiness here, not until we defeated Rex's army. I squared my shoulders and nodded as we passed people. None of the knights spoke, and the stark image must have been frightening people. I continued to acknowledge everyone I could in the eye.

  Thor lowered his voice and asked, "People are nodding to you. Are you charming people now?"

  People had assume I was the worst possible brat up till now. I gently pushed against his arm. "I don't know if I can."

  I peered closer as we passed a shoe shop. It was the girl I met the day I came to town. This was why I'd help Thor. He gave people a second chance.

  He made a sound to his horse and then asked, "Why?"

  I shrugged and continued to greet everyone I saw. "I made a fool of myself."

  We rode into the castle and toward the stables. Thor took my hand in his though we still hadn't stopped. "Don't worry about what happened. You're the most interesting woman I've ever met. Your honest and forthright must be your middle name."

  "Honorable would be a nicer." A stable lad came toward us with an apple for the horse. Another boy came out with a ladder. Thor turned around and helped me down to the steps first. He then followed and the clink of his metal armor echoed through the court yard. I waited until he walked besides me and then said, "When you say things like that my heart stirs. I like you talk to me like a normal person."

  I'd kiss him if we weren’t a public spectacle. I pressed my lips together and decided to kiss him, later. My entire body soared as I stood close. Then the door into the castle opened and two ladies in fine dresses stood there and stared at us. My skin prickled now that we were back. I had no idea who they were or what they did. I needed to find my place.

  As we stepped inside, Thor gave me a heated look. "Why don't you go change into something a lady might wear and then meet me in the hall?"

  My face was warm as I bowed. "Yes, Your Majesty."

  My mind was foggy from the ride as I walked toward the stairs that led to my room. Thor both melted my heart and expected me to be more than I was. I didn't know if I could do it, but I was willing to try.

  Chapter 19

  I rushed back to my room, threw my dirty clothes on the ground and raced into the bathroom. I smelled like Thor's horse and until that smell came off, I couldn't get my way with Thor or anyone.

  After the steam took some of the aches in my body away, I dried myself and looked out the window. It was still late in the afternoon. If this was the last day before a huge battle, then I had to think of something for those not a part of Thor's defense plans. Everyone had to be safe, and I needed Nel's help to make this possible.

  My bedroom door opened and I jumped to my feet. Nel slipped inside, carrying some clothes with her. I sat down as she handed me a soft silk material that must be for underneath my clothes. Adrenaline washed through me. I had to get everything done now. I moistened my lips and then said, "Nel, I need to look like a lady, and I'd prefer to not wear Morgana's things."

  Nel curtsied. "Any news?"

  Thor would tell everyone else, but Nel was my friend. My cheeks pricked as I thought I should wait for Thor's announcement, but I needed Nel's help to do what I wanted. "Not good, Nel. Rex's army is heading here."

  Nel's face wrinkled and then she asked, "What about the battle in LaNoi? Did Sir Wain win or lose?"

  "I don't know." LaNoi was where the battle was? Now that I saw how far London was from here, I had no idea where LaNoi was, but it had to be far, far away. I pressed my lips together. "I do know that Sir Wain is coming to Avalon to help protect us." I swallowed. "The rescue of Morgana will make Avalon an attack point."

  Nel opened the closet door and picked out a few dresses to put on my bed as she said, "His army is split too because of the major battle. I hope we can withstand Rex's troops."

  Clearly Nel knew more of the battle plans than I did at the moment. My stomach hardened as I asked, "What are the defenses for inside the castle?"

  "Since I've been here, we've never used them.” She stopped and stared at the closet without looking at me. "But there is a bunker inside the castle, my lady."

  Tension released from my shoulders. "We'll make use of it for the elderly and the children. I need to see Thor now."

  Nel left the closet with the final handful of dresses and then went to my bed to sort them into two piles. "You seem more settled in accepting your place here now."

  God help me. I didn't know about anything except right now I was needed. So I changed the topic. "I want something a lady would wear." I joined her to study the clothes.

  "I have the gown maker in the other room. She has a few pre-made with the sizes I recommended, but we need to ensure the measurements I took of you are right. Shall I bring her in?"

  "Yes." If I made this decision to live here, then I'd have to play the part of Queen next to a queen.

  Chatter outside my window drew my attention. I glanced toward the ground and caught a glimpse of how Morgana gathered with her women right there on the lawn. I chewed my lower lip. She had chosen to meet with her acolytes so I'd hear her.

  What was she up to now? At least I hadn't said that out loud. I pulled my head back and said, "Also we passed a lady in the shops near the gate who makes shoes. I spoke with her before I knew I tested as queen. I'd like to buy from her, Nel. She's about my age, height and hair color."

  Nel nodded. "I will find her and bring her to you."

  "Perfect. Thank you."

  She left and a few minutes later came right back in with another woman. This one wore all black that matched her wild dark hair. She circled me as two more girls came into the room. The wild-haired woman nodded, then reached out and measured my waist. I held my head high and let her. She yelled out numbers to one of the other women who wrote it down. I swallowed and asked, "Do you have anything made for tonight?"

  "The measurements were decent." Her curls flew everywhere as she nodded. "I have a few gowns you may use, but I should ensure they fit perfectly. You are to be queen here. Have you decided on a color? I'd suggest a blue for this evening."

  It would match my amulet. However I'd not remind everyone of Rex tonight and, besides, I didn't know about the lifetime queen thing. I shook my head and gazed into her brown eyes. "Red. I'd like to stand out in a crowd. If it's our last night before war comes, then I want to shine next to Thor."

  Nel let out a deep breath as she finished sorting the dresses. She hung a few pieces back in the closet as she said, "Red. That sounds wonderful."

  The designer pointed to one of the girls who ran out of the room and then she told me, "I will make you a dozen new gowns to your size in a variety of colors."

  I wanted to rub my neck, but not in front of the woman. She intimidated me. "What's your name, dress maker?"

  The woman stopped. "Eleonora, Your Majesty."

  My face grew warm and I couldn't bring myself to look at Nel. I stared at Eleonora instead. "If I accept Thor's marriage proposal, I'll need something amazing to tell everyone in."

  Eleonora stepped forward and bowed. "I will make you the perfect dress that meshes your fiery colors to Thor's cooler complexion."

  Thor was so calm and reassuring. Perhaps I should be fiery to show balance somehow. The sky was turning orange and evening was about to set. Ordering dresses was taking so much time and the afternoon only had a few more hours. "Thank you."

  El
eonora left the room and Nel was there to help me into the red dress. She kept it on the bed, and instead held a white underskirt for me to step in. She was about to tie it on my waist as she stopped. "Are you going to end Thor's wait then? There are rumors flying all over the castle of how you were so close as you rode into town."

  Nel's kindness since the moment we met sent a warmness through me. I couldn't lie to her. I whispered. "I don't know. A wedding right now doesn't make much sense. I will decide if we win against Rex so people can celebrate."

  Nel didn't move. She held the ties in her hand. "And if we lose, what happens?"

  I turned my face so she couldn't see my eyes. "Let's not think about it, but I remember how to survive in the forest. There are others out there so we'll find a way to live. I want to believe Thor will win."

  "Me too." She tied the skirt, rubbing the back of my shoulder much like my mother would have done and then she said, "Thor will be happy."

  My mother might not be proud. She had run from her life of royalty. I grimaced and turned back toward the door as one of Eleonora's servants returned with a red shawl that matched the dress and red slippers. The sky was now darkening. Dinner would be soon and I'd not hold him back. "Hurry. I've spent too long here already. I want to find Thor."

  I clutched my amulet on my neck and tucked it under the dress so no one saw. Eleonora handed the accessories to Nel who then placed everything next to my bed as Nel said, "Of course, my lady."

  The servants in my room stared at me in silence. I held my finger up to stop Nel from checking the neckline for the fifth time and then said, "Thank you Eleonora, for everything. I can't wait to see what you make for an engagement."

  She and her two servants bowed. "It will be splendid."

  Nel brushed my hair the moment the door closed. A few minutes later, she held the dress over my head and let me climb into the material. She tied it in the back and helped me ensure all the parts of me went to the right parts of the dress. Once she was done, Nel stepped back and smiled. "You look amazing. It's almost perfect."

  Perfect reminded me that someone in the castle didn't wish me to help Thor at all. Morgana intended to be queen. Nel stepped back, but I grabbed her arms. "Please find out what you can about Morgana and then let me know as soon as you can."

  She blinked. Her blank expression told me she had no idea why. My heart raced. I'd spoken too fast for her when I needed to be more calm, like Thor. "Are you worried about anything in particular?"

  The moon began to show in my window. Now was not the time. I rubbed the back of my neck. "No. Just do me a favor and tell me what you hear. I don't want to wake up with her in the room again. Is it possible that you can stay with me tonight?"

  She bobbed her head in agreement. "Understood and I'll make a bed for myself while you're gone, my lady."

  At last, we were done with my toilette. I glanced at myself one more time. Despite the hair and eye color, I did look like my mother, no mistake. Royalty. My mother had always had a softness I never had. Perhaps with Thor, I might learn that skill. I rolled my shoulders back and walked out to the hall.

  As I went to find Thor in the dining hall, my heart raced. I turned a corner and stepped into the castle courtyard. I must have made a wrong turn. The air smelt of men and activity. I pressed my lips together and walked out further. Delott came up beside me as if I'd invited him. "You are even more radiant tonight, dressed as a lady."

  I preferred the boy's breeches to run from him. I rubbed my arms and refused to look at him. My skin felt raw. I did not wear this dress for him. "Thanks. I'm looking for Thor."

  A loud sigh escaped his lips. "It breaks my heart to constantly bring you to another man."

  This was too much. We hardly knew each other, though my skin grew goose bumps which I'm sure were from how rattled he made me. "I'm sure you'll mend it just fine. Do you know where he is?"

  He shrugged but his gaze seemed broken. "Training practice men with swords in the pit. Thor believes training even after a ride helps keep stamina up."

  Thor understood everyone needed to be prepared. I nodded and tried to skirt past him. "Thank you."

  Delott tried to offer his arm to me. "I will bring you..."

  I stepped away from his outstretched arm and shook my head. "Absolutely not. I can find my own way here. Thank you for the offer, but it's not desired."

  The laughter etched on his face read he didn't believe anything I said. "If you say so, my lady."

  I could wait in the dining hall, but I wanted to see Thor. My face felt flushed as I walked toward the men shouting in the training yard. Delott shouldn't get under my skin this way.

  Shouts and cheers for Thor and Merlin grabbed my attention and I followed the sound to a small enclosed field. Men blocked my view, but I pushed my way through the crowd. Then my eyes widened. Merlin and Thor were locked in the pit without their shirts on as they used their swords in a fight.

  Thor's kiss the other day sparked something inside me, and my mouth watered as he used his sword to push at Merlin's arm and earn a point.

  "Your lady is here, Your Majesty," Merlin shouted.

  Thor turned his head and Merlin punched him in the stomach with the sword hand.

  Thor's chest caved and he took a second to breathe. His face turned red, and my heart raced. Then Thor laughed, stood up and shook his head. "Cheater."

  Merlin bowed. "I've always said that a good distraction can help you win."

  Thor slapped Merlin on the back as they left the pit to join me. My pulse was electrified the moment I saw his blue eyes. Thor told his friend, "Still my teacher even after all these years? Give me a moment to talk to Gwen."

  A teacher since birth it seemed, recalling the conversation we'd had on the train yesterday. No one other than my parents had been in my life for that long. Thor handed his sword to Chaus and leaned over the fence in front of my face. Then he winked. "Hello."

  I'd not kiss him here, if that's what he intended. My lips parted and my pulse skipped. "You look very pretty. Why are you here?"

  My lips grew moist as I stared at his mouth, so I turned my head for a moment to get myself together. Then I lifted my gaze and smiled at him. "You promised to teach me the crossbow."

  Thor snapped to his right and didn't break our connection as he said, "Yes. Chaus."

  Chaus stood beside us while Thor and I kept eye contact. Chaus' voice squeaked. "Your Highness?"

  Thor opened his mouth and I stared at his lips. Fireworks exploded inside me, though I stepped back. Then he turned his head, "Please go into the archery field and teach my lady the basics of holding the crossbow and arrow. And ensure she gets the crossbow we discussed. I will be there as soon as I can."

  Chaus was fine. He didn't make my body stir at all. I nodded my head though I tried to school my smile. Thor intended to gift me a crossbow. I bit my lower lip and pushed my hair behind my ear.

  This time, I'd treat Thor right in public. I lowered my head and didn't move. I had to be a lady now, even if every organ in my body shook and whispered I wasn't strong. I refused to cower in my room and not know how to defend myself. Thor stared at me and expected me to say something else. I wish I knew what, but with all his men around, I had to hold my tongue. With a sigh, I stood on my tip toes and kissed his cheek. He turned his head and for a moment, our lips met. My heart hammered as I forget where we were.

  Merlin’s laugh filtered into my brain and I pulled away. Thor winked at me. I nodded. Then I turned, with Chaus on my heels.

  As we left Thor, my body cooled. I followed Chaus to a shed of weapons where he took out two crossbows. I bounced on my feet. This was at least something that I might do to physically help. Chaus handed me the black crossbow with gold emblems I'd held on my first ride to Avalon with Thor. I clutched it and decided it would forever be named Light Redeemer. Father had called his regular bow Redemption. I imagined he'd always be beside me now. I licked my lips and decided the darkness of the wood represented those who went agai
nst me.

  Chaus didn't know my thoughts as he led me to a field in a slight distance but within the walls.

  Chaus avoided my gaze as he set up a target. I held Light Redeemer as tight as I could. It was heavier then I remembered. I braced my feet and waited for him to tell me what to do. At first Chaus said nothing. I didn't move and didn't look at him. I'd not frighten him more. Chaus' arm was red. I glanced at him and realized that his entire face matched. I sighed and waited for his instruction.

  Finally he squeaked out, "This is the easiest weapon of today, my lady. Hold it against your chest with the arrow facing the target. Once you aim, you release the arrow from the lever and you're done."

  Again I didn't look at him. I didn't dare. I placed the arrow in the middle and clicked it to stay in. Unlike him, I had breasts that pressed against the handle. I didn't say a word, but I held the crossbow closer to my chest. "That sounds easy enough."

  Chaus modeled what to do and released his. He hit the bull's-eye. I turned my body toward the hay-stuffed bag with a black center. I released the lever and watched as my arrow completely missed the bag and hit the wall. I grimaced and turned toward Chaus. "What did I do wrong?"

  A voice behind me sent heat right into my neck as he said, "You didn't aim."

  I didn't smile. I tried not to react at all. "Delott."

  He came beside me and picked up an arrow from Chaus. "Your Majesty. I can help you, if you like."

  I opened and closed my mouth. I didn't know what to say, but then I stared at the center of the bag. I needed to be able to shoot this. I ignored the sinking feeling in my stomach and asked, "You can tell me how to aim?"

  He took Light Redeemer and placed the arrow inside. "Yes."

  After this no one would ever take my weapon from me again. I hugged my waist and watched. One or two shots might help me succeed and then he had to leave. Thor would be along soon and I didn't want to explain being near Delott again. I saw how quiet Chaus was as I nodded my head. "Very well."